
Held like something holy, by something holy


∆ Neural Alchemist | Self-mythologist ∆

When we went without
I forgot my name
Things were not good
We’d be ripe and mean
We’d beg and fight
Skin splitting
Play tug of war with our faces
Growl through negative space
I am awake
I am awake
I am awake
I plead
insanity
I give
him control
Still
painting him in contrast
I just sit in my nest.
And wail and cry and sob.
I’m fragile and I delight in explosion.
At the edge of grief
I’m swallowed by it whole.
— from Repetitions of Ruin
(incantations from the same wound)
we had the same conversations like it was yesterday
i wore blue for days and days straight
i wore all my fibers as you
i knew you were blue too
i fasted
i was corrupt
you wouldn’t let my burn touch a thing
you laughed in the face of it
Rooted into my soul,
he was vital, he oppressed
Potent love,
a bold kind.
Violent
His tongue barbaric
Puissant hand in hand
But he needed me.
I needed him—
I was afraid to say.
He held me.
He told me,
he’d keep me safe.
Shielding my power with his power
He was my someone
He was someone


She and I marry as she loosened her hair
I was warm between her legs
She was home
Welcoming
I loved to please her
I willingly submitted
She knew she was my baby
I knew how to make her come back
She was my intuition
Our whispering heads
Dancing heart
She played tug of war
Passioned
Me
I made love
She is my intention



The fire is live in me
I see the flames as they shift into you
One more time
The diver of my feelings
The hair on my arms dance for you
We remember
A moon cycle glanced your way
You made promises you kept
How I resent you for that