Heavy

I want to be seen through and through

I want to have enough, never stop

There’s pauses in my membrane

I don’t recall the order of fate

How I wish it’d play out

How I pray to erase

Escaping is the back door

Unspoken

I beg my soul to be revoked and

The soul never wanted to carry me anyways

It names me a burden

Dead weight

Hips in heaps of heavy and a bit unsteady

Haunting

Smokey listeners

Reaching for the shallow limbs of black

They sink and wail to discover life

And so I remain, printed and somewhat flaky 

Together, forested in fictions

I lie to myself when I stretch out of the hopeful comforts

I’m picked as bark

The dog days are quite holy; haunting 

The body was muddy and dug out of void

Being, holy as well

Peer through 

Identify me, then leave me to be, leave me alone

As I grow feral to the moans of cicadas 

I will touch the golden skies in faith

The ones I indulge in and tell stories about

Stillness

Around you I tread gently

I treat you with kid gloves

I rock you to sleep

Thinking little nothings

Riding the wave

I try to behave

My heart is your slave

She prefers it that way

There’s an unspoken rule here

As we tangle and toss my dear

I won’t speak if you don’t

You have my word

You

The mystic, the wonder

The ending of my cycles

Severed as selfish stings of venom

It’s you

It’s you

You gave, oh yes you did

Fickle flavor created my taste

And as my appetite fluctuates

I choose to starve

Washed over in drought

Sand dunes and Florida watered illusions

I see you

I saw you

I thank you

Tiny glass

My lover was passive

He was made of glass and

We didn’t appear full enough

Tried making eye contact in summer trees

Seeing we weren’t meant to become lucid bees

Just tiny things playing make believe

Reason

I always come back to sadness

Maybe it’s a shape shifting anger

Maybe we’ve hung her; together

But it’s all I ever knew, it’s whom I make true intricate love to

I inflicted upon me paired with hesitations and soon to be’s

cause well maybe I’m human

I sink through all your deadly seas

I sort through my pieces of wool and used flannels and cloth

And I touch the human in every passerby knowing it’s never enough

I touch the heart that aches with stone burning parallels

I touch the mouths through mountains of victims as the dead sings farwells

I vow to be untouched

It’s not enough to breathe in and exhale my stomach, my liver; my heart

It’s hard enough to wake alert and dress up the rest with the earth’s hardened dirt

Soul tied to a suit and some layers that aren’t mine

But to most it’s fine, some say quite divine

I couldn’t harm a fly; I wish to kill a billion

And so

I harm the self that promises to let things go (let things sow)

Burdened by the death of each solitary season

Hands pressed in pulses pleading to be granted the sights of a hermits reason

Newness

What news!

The arrival

And the departure

Both equal in value and pleasure

To the adventurous wondering soul