By the Door of the Music Room

by the door of the music room
what does one do
when sound hums like prophecy
to the rhythm of one’s soul

spoiling all the way home
anointed with myrrh
a finger on the temple

what does one do
by the door of the music room

I Turn Void

Gasping for your air
I turn void
I cave in
Absorbed by your flesh
Seeking words of salvation
a cure to the spell
Fatal devotion
I’ll rage without it
Won’t care about anything else

The One Who Stayed Grounded

He aroused me till numb

My heart sedated by his insanity

Caught me mid-revelation

Reaching for me at the height of his vision

.

I wanted him to come with me

But he wasn’t that type of guy

It pained him to watch me as I’d fly

Still front and center he’d release me wild

He ached to carry me whenever I fell

.

Rubbed me up with aloe vera

And intuitive kisses to heal

Wanted to make it well

Fading as I opened to it

Defeated in the win

So I held him also in sin.

The Ground Still Loved Me

I’ve been crying hard.
It’s what I do best.
The ground is loved on by the seeds of clouds.

But I’m fragile,
and I soften in explosion.
When I experience grief,
I face it suddenly.
There is no space

— from Repetitions of Ruin 
(incantations from the same wound)

Ripe and Mean

When we went without
I forgot my name
Things were not good
We’d be ripe and mean
We’d beg and fight
Skin splitting
Play tug of war with our faces
Growl through negative space
I am awake
I am awake
I am awake
I plead
insanity
I give
him control
Still
painting him in contrast

Collapsed

When I experience grief
I open and everything enters.
There is no space.
I’m suffocated by spirits.
I’m blotchy, dry, aching.

— from Repetitions of Ruin 
(incantations from the same wound)

Nest of Sorrow

I just sit in my nest.
And wail and cry and sob.
I’m fragile and I delight in explosion.
At the edge of grief
I’m swallowed by it whole.

— from Repetitions of Ruin  
(incantations from the same wound)

I Wore You

we had the same conversations like it was yesterday
i wore blue for days and days straight
i wore all my fibers as you
i knew you were blue too
i fasted
i was corrupt
you wouldn’t let my burn touch a thing
you laughed in the face of it