One hundred Lonely Years
Connections
Connections aren’t clear as Babylon glitches. We’re here then we aren’t. It puts me off. So I limbo and toe the ground. Put my cheek on it, feel the heat.
It’s the earth. And she’ll make it up to me.
January 18, 2024
What ever happened to “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”.
To this day I honor this wisdom. Yes it’s okay to vent but overall social media is a prime example of the dangers of gossip and comparison. I’m reprogramming myself to not have so many opinions. I don’t need to judge everything, especially things that have nothing to do with me; which while living a more simple life I realized not much has to do with me and I’m quite irrelevant to the next passerby. Idk I’m really dedicated to not exerting my energy when I don’t need to which I’m finding out is more often than not. Weening myself off of the “tea time” dramas I’m currently attached to, I must admit Im not perfect and like a little drama here and there. But I’ll just keep it to myself.
Why are we attracted to drama? What is so appealing about it?
Wisdom on a feather
One day my hair will touch my toes and I’ll remember this day. I was called a diamond the same time you met me. I had wisdom on a feather written in my love to beloved.
One hundred Lonely Years
January 21, 2024
I’m learning so much about my family since opening my home to my little sisters. It’s been hard but also a big opportunity to grow. Ive decided to recreate my role in my family. Moving away from being just the relatable safe big sister to accepting my role as the matriarch. I’m seeing first hand how these kids are being neglected by parents as well as the education system.
The kids are not the problem. Society is failing these kids.
Growing to be the bigger person to take on the role to guide instead of getting stuck in triggers and ego and allowing us all the remain stagnant. I’m realizing my siblings have no real home training and lack basic respect. I work hard to not blame them for what they haven’t been taught. I find joy at the same time in providing a safe space for them. Goodness though it’s hard being to others what you’ve never received but alas, the fate of the healer I suppose.
Oh
Oh benevolent
beloved be as you are
and I’ll make love with you
sing praises between you
Hmmm the way that we blend
and a scent so sweet
Knowing
She was
She was a mirror
An alignment
An embodiment
A step ahead
And I believed I loved her
October 15, 2018
Golden red, oranges, and yellows. Pick me up and bring me home. Touch older hearts too sore to feel it. But will believe in, the time of seasons. I knew I’ll never see this self again. When they said that real love was yet to be felt. That upon touch, all else would melt to one. Nothing else should matter. Nothing else even matters.
Freegrandmaa 